This'll Just Take a Minute

In an instant I had a feeling of horror and dismay combined with a weird sort of pride and satisfaction, which unsettled me. Suffice it to say, the TV remote control has been put in the basket on top of the refrigerator until further notice. Kenzo got a "new" shirt today.  He was curious about it. He knew by the insignia on the front that it was a soccer uniform shirt, and he quickly did the math and figured out it was papa's soccer uniform shirt from when he was a little boy. He asked me about the name on the back and I told him that's what people called me a long time ago and that it's a Hungarian nickname that means "little bear," which delighted him. He said he's a little bear too, and then self-corrected and said he's actually a little monkey, which is definitely more accurate. One of the boys' bus stop friends is moving, so Eri took the boys to play with him one last time before he goes off to his new neighborhood. We also finally got p...

Eri and the boys were out all morning in Izumi Chuo. They had lots of library books to return and the boys were super excited to play in the playroom while mama attended her mama meeting. There's this group meeting held regularly sponsored by the local government for mothers to get together and talk about stuff. I love that Eri goes. I know she probably talks about me and that's good. Or maybe she doesn't and I'm being narcissistic assuming that she does. Either way, it's her time to talk about motherly issues with other moms and a counselor who understands. Spring is here, though it's Miyagi so the cherry blossoms are still sorta sprouting and the tops of the surrounding mountains are still white. The breeze after the morning chill is perfect. After starting work early and pushing through way past noon I took a late lunchtime walk. A long one. I had a meeting with the customer support manager at 13:30 but I figured I could get some good steps in and still make ...

Spring break is the opposite of a break for Eri. I know that ten and twenty years from now we're both gonna wish we could relive these days, though. I relive them now by writing it all down at night. In the summer of 1982 I turned seven years old and my sister turned five a couple of months later. It was right around that time that we went to the movie theater with our mom to see  E.T. My memory is sketchy since I was seven and all, but I remember being both excited and scared. The ending with the guys in the hazmat suits was pretty harrowing.  Fast forward 41 years and Kenzo and Osamu are almost exactly the same age and today they went with mama to the movie theater.  Not E.T. though. They went and saw the new Doraemon movie . Eri was worried because the movie was almost two hours long, but the boys did great. They love Doraemon and were totally into it the entire time. They got souvenir programs and soaked in the whole theater experience.  Even though I don't re...

I took the morning off to go see my psychiatrist and get my anxiety medicine refilled. Gotta do it every three weeks. The doc had me coming in every two weeks but I negotiated for three since taking time off and going downtown every other week was getting hard to manage. Downtown Sendai is finally starting to show signs of springtime. It's gonna be a few more weeks before the cherry blossoms really come out in force, but the ones that decided to bloom early made for a splendid walk from Hirosedori to Kotodaikoen after my appointment. I always have music stuck in my head. It's rare when I don't have a song or piece of music on a constant loop as the soundtrack to the three ring circus inside my brain. I don't even have earbuds or anything stuck in my ears most of the time, and when I do it's usually a podcast. Today it was this . Shooting Star . The "Unplugged" version. I love it more than the original album version. The lyrics have been in my head for 30 y...

Unless it's raining or snowing the first thing I do when I get up every morning is open all the windows upstairs and make the beds. When I head downstairs, depending on how concentrated the boys are on their current project or television program, I usually get a, "Good morning papa!" followed sometimes by a, "Why are you so late papa?" My sleep habits are still a mess. I fell asleep at the coffee table again last night, which was rather easy since I was really tired and it was still raining outside. The sound of rain combined with a hot bath and the hot carpet and a glass of wine with my book in the living room after everyone has gone to bed. I think it was after 3 when I perked up and brushed my teeth and snuck into bed. So when my alarm goes off at 6:30 technically I've gotten about 6 hours of sleep, but it's not good sleep. It's just inertness with my eyes closed. Eri took the boys to the otolaryngologist, which I now know is the fancy name for th...

It rained all day, but that didn’t stop the boys and I from having another great Sunday. My friend Nico is a car enthusiast and has a group of friends who all have cool sports cars and race cars. He invited us to their car club brunch this morning at Flat White Coffee . Even in the rain the boys were super excited to see the cars. I was excited about the special brunch menu they organized - French toast, tomato bisque, and their delicious signature coffee.  After brunch I had planned on taking the boys to the mall to hang out and look around, but Osamu ended up falling down in the coffee shop parking lot and bruised his knee and got his pants soaking wet so we had to go home earlier than scheduled. He cried all the way home. His fall wasn't that bad. I saw it. But when Eri and I were checking out his injuries our completely non-medically-trained diagnosis included twisted ankle, broken bone, and dislocated knee. Turns out all he needed was a bandaid. Within thirty minutes he was ba...

Mama's onigiris in the park are the best. Seaweed-wrapped and filled with salmon. A ghost woke me up this morning. Turns out it was just Kenzo with a blanket over him. He was very pleased with the fact that my reaction was actually genuine surprise. When I made my way downstairs the boys had already gotten their soccer uniforms on and eaten pancakes. I got them set up with their toothbrushes and did face washing and thermos filling and final departure check. Kenzo and Osamu love soccer Saturday. I know part of why they love it is because the coaches are great. Osamu especially loves Coach Ono. He's such a good guy, and always humors the kids when they ask him to kick the ball so it bounces off the roof of the dome. He might be a show-off, but he's forgiven. He just likes playing soccer and teaching kids to play. Coach Hama is a super big guy that commands a serious presence. The main dude, Coach Ike, told me today that Osamu seems to be showing serious improvement. When I a...

My semi weekly managerial meeting was this morning and it was my turn to write the minutes. So I had to actually pay attention.  Even though the meeting is in Japanese I write the minutes in English and everyone is cool with that. It would take me three times as long to go through and check my Japanese. I do use Japanese words as a matter of efficiency when I don’t have time to think about what something means in English. Today there was talk of gross and net profit margins and I just used the Japanese words because it was easier. Strangely. Even in English I can't explain what a profit margin is. Today was one of those long tedious meetings. To be fair they're often long and tedious. Our regular update meeting started at nine and naturally started to wrap up around 10:30, but the big boss wanted to also do a detailed explanation and review of the forthcoming fiscal year budget. I was sort of ready. I made my coffee extra strong today. Kenzo is asking me more often now to show ...

I wrote a strongly worded email to my boss this morning regarding one of my team members, who I strongly feel is being treated unfairly. I know that technically he’s being treated according to the rules of his contract, but I think the rules are unfair and I expressed that to my department manager. I’ve always been strongly adverse to confrontation and tend to avoid it at all costs. But these days I find myself welcoming it more and more. Maybe part of it is age and maybe it could be late blooming maturity. One thing that I do know for sure is that when it comes to protecting and advocating for my team members my fear of confrontation starts to diminish. Just like anyone, I’ve had confrontation thrust upon me over the years. My previous boss of over 10 years was particularly crotchety and regularly and randomly decided to start beefs with me. I think all those years of enduring her scolding and ranting and complaining toughened me up a little bit. Fast forward to now and I have a boss ...

Today was Osamu's last full day of his first year of kindergarten. Next month he'll be in his new 2nd year class and wearing a uniform every day.  Eri got a sack of old clothes from one of the moms at the bus stop and these pants suit Osamu so perfectly. He reminds me of one of the Little Rascals. At first I thought he wasn't going to like the pants, but after some extra praise from mama and papa he seemed very proud of his "new" fashionable wardrobe.

Today was a national holiday. Vernal Equinox. The arrival of spring is traditionally very important here. Part of the traditions include visiting family graves, so when I walked through the Dounji graveyard in the afternoon it was full of fresh flowers that smelled remarkable combined with the solemnity of incense wafting through the air. Plus the early-bird cherry blossoms are adding color. It's been snowy and barren since November, but wow today was a reawakening.  The boys and I did a neighborhood park tour in the morning. We left at 9 a.m. and hit up five parks before lunchtime. After lunch and a nap we played at two more parks. Well one was a repeat but seven total park visits. Kenzo saw a lizard at the one park and couldn't catch it so he wanted to go back and try again. He got pretty upset when the lizard evaded capture. He already had a name ready and everything. He said his friend is an expert at naming lizards and advised him that Shinobu was a good name, so Kenzo re...

Eri drove to her sister's place down in Watari to help with the new baby for the day. Her mom’s been down there helping but she needed a day off to rest her back. Eri left mid morning and was home for dinner time. That meant in order to make my workday work I had to do some creative scheduling. Kenzo is home now because he's a kindergarten graduate. He's good at keeping himself busy, though he does forget that papa is employed and talks to me a lot even when I'm in meetings. I don't mind. I kinda like it. It makes my day more interesting and it's just a blessing to be able to do my job while also being with him. At 14:00 we walked to the bus stop to pick up Osamu. I shifted my lunch break. Kenzo complained a little on the way that he was tired. It's about 1.5 kilometers one way, which is a pretty good distance for a little dude. I'm pretty sure he runs three times that on any given day but just doesn't think about it. On the way back with Osamu in to...

After I tucked the boys into bed and headed downstairs the smell of the bread maker greeted me with yeasty goodness. Later on, for a midnight snack I sliced off a piece of the bread as it was starting to cool and spread some cream cheese on it and gobbled it up like those geese you always see at lakes. A bread maker is one of those items I would never consider having. For Eri it was a matter of course. And our lives are better for it. Auntie Grace came over to babysit the boys for a few hours, so Eri and I started our morning off with coffee and cake at Nakao Cafe . I rarely eat cake these days, but when you have a chance to eat some superb New York cheesecake you gotta take it. Eri loves her shortcakes. Then Eri had the great idea of heading to a hot spring bath not far from our house. The boys and I pass Sawaoto Onsen all the time when we go play and watch the bullet train in Rifu Town. We should've gone before. It was just right. Simple, relaxing, quiet. Then Eri had another mo...

Kenzo and Osamu and I pulled out of the driveway and headed to soccer in the snow. More like heavy sleet. It wasn't sticking, just furiously coming down. As is their way the boys engage in non-stop non-sequitur monologues that sometimes converge. We were stopped at a light and I looked in the rearview mirror at them and said, "Stinky says what?" They stopped and looked at me, quietly waiting for what was going to happen next. I repeated it. "Stinky says what?" They looked at each other and smiled and Kenzo sheepishly says, "Whaaaat?"  So of course I delightfully announced, "Exactly," and followed up for clarification that he is stinky because I said stinky says what and he said what. This was followed by immediate raucous laughter. And then it began. They immediately took hold of this new lingual power and began teasing each other and me with as many variations of "stinky says what" as they could think of. Osamu of course wasted no ...

After about a five month hiatus I went back to my Friday night group counseling meeting. Tonight it was only me and one other guy who is a regular so I figured we probably wouldn’t use up the whole 90 minutes. But we did. There was a lot to talk about. I always go into those sessions having no idea what to talk about, but somehow once it starts things just start flowing out. Tonight I talked about a couple of things that I’ve not really talked about with any other person ever and I think the counselor could tell. He asked me some questions about things I had never ever considered before and when I left the inside of my head, which is usually a combination of a giant flea market and a cyclone, was strangely calm. I need more of that inner calm. The questions he asked helped me focus. I wish I could come up with those kinds of questions on my own and save a little time and money. I got on the subway and headed home, taking my time walking home from the station, listening to the peaceful ...

The big day finally came. Osamu was especially cool today with his necktie and sunglasses. Osamu might be the most famous little brother at their kindergarten. The entire staff knows him, which is either really great or really not great. I'm still not exactly sure. Kenzo thinks it's the funniest thing to make sad faces when we're taking pictures. It is pretty funny. And annoying. Osamu couldn't take it anymore. Midway through graduation he wanted to go out and play. So we did. We weren't the only ones. Eri stayed inside the hall for the whole enchilada.  After the graduation ceremony Kenzo's class met for one last time. Their teachers read them letters they wrote and there were some tears shed. Afterward we went out for a special lunch. Chinese food at Aeon Town. Kenzo loves fried rice. Osamu spilled his juice and cried like crazy but the nice waitress brought him a new one and he calmed down. He was upset because his pants got wet. The same boy who loves jump...